It's closing in on two in the morning. And I'm up planning shoots. Still. Right now I'm pretty tired. Have to get up early tomorrow to change the livingroom to a studio. If the studio isn't available to you, make it yourself. 

If life gives you lemons... Uhm... I want to say squeeze it into everybody's eyes and say suck it maddafakkas. But I guess I should make lamonade out of it or something?

Only one week 'til London. And I am just too excited to manage to wait a whole week to do all I'm gonna do!

Oh well, first I guess I need some sleep. I end this post with a pic of me today before heading out to lie in a park and relax. I am now ceverly sunburnt, but it was so worth it.

Good night!

 

If only I got money for this

Right at this moment I'm working on no less than six shoots. None of which get paid in dollas. A little sucky, but it is all fun and games and a way to evolve and learn, so I'm allright.

And one of these shoots will make one of my (not-so)secret dreams come true. I'll try to take the pictures on film. You know, the good ol' filmroll - not the movie-kind-of-film. I'll get to borrow my grandfather's camera again today, and I'll take it with me to London in a week (Oh my god, just realized that I won't have any space in my on-board-sized-suitcase for like other stuff than workstuff. You know, trousers and a toothbrush? Damn, am taking with me three cameras and all the accesories to it + my computer since I'm having ceveral (!) shoots on the trip).

Oh and yeah I also found out the other day while talking to someone I haven't met in a long time: I have absolutely NO personal life! She was all like oh yeah and I'm flirting with him, it's drama with him and her and I do this and this - Oh how are you? Do you have anything going on in your life? And that's when that conversation kindof haltered. I sat down and really went through in my mind what I could say and all I came up with was: I'm going to London though! ...To take pictures... because... I don't have any other life. Don't get me wrong, I love taking pictures - well, obviously, since that is all my life is about - but it was kind of like a smack in the face since I've never really thought about the fact that everything I do and think about involves work. Boyfriend? whaaat? Someone to flirt with? What whaaat? Drama? Eeeeh... I aint got nothing to tell about. Unless you want to hear about one of my six shoots. And models. And light-setting-ideas. And my thoughts on how to get in the industry.

So here is three pictures of my life the last week. Me on editing-hour: way late at night, the reading I've done and a photo of my feet when I woke up from being asleep on the floor and figured I needed to take a dress and some heels on and go picnic'in.

Dried Flower

Tell Me I'm Your National Anthem

Sleaze

This is how I feel right now

I get bored way too easily

Or maybe that's a good thing?

It's all about the Heart

Some inspiration, some drawings I've done, some thoughts about where I stand at the moment. My big repeat in my sketching is the human heart.


Sources: Charmaine Olivia, The Road is Home, Google and me.

Some parts of a worked up mind

I never want to work full time in a dead-end job again. My mind is seriously bursting with ideas and they are extravagant, bigger and crazier than before. Collaborations, traveling, publicity. I am working towards a goal and for the first time in what I may believe is -ever- I feel I am starting to get the idea on where to start and where I want to go. You know, one thing is figuring out what your dream is, another thing is figuring out how to get there. That is something schools rarely touches. "You have to figure it out yourselves". Crazy-ass, impossible life-lesson. But oh sure, if there is one thing I will take with me to the grave, then it is that I am way to stubborn for my own well being. And that is why I am now taking a trip to London in one month to have a photoshoot. And why I will go to Copenhagen for another one. And to Tokyo for the third later this year. And even though I only work part-time in a paid job at the moment, I sure as hell work far above 100% on that other, unpaid one. And the money might not be there, and I might be going on the fourth week with noodles and water, and the equipment I need are not getting funded, but you know what... It's all worth it. It is all bloody worth it, I don't have a nine-to-five-job, I don't know if I need to get up at eight AM the next day, I don't have the sinking feeling of having to do the same thing every day, week after week. I am on the other hand doing stuff I love every day.

And my conclution is that the more I work with photography, the more I get into it.

I am so worked up, I am so excited. My life is about fashion. Period.



ps the pictures are just... random pictures I like right now. xx

Homepage 2013

My homepage is updated and renewed, check it out! 

Now it's back to the pictures of gorgeous Karina. I just wish I had the inspiration in me to do what I feel could make the pictures justice. But I am just totally blank on what to do to give them that little push into something explosive. If you know what I mean?

It's four months since you passed away and I still cry with my whole heart. 

Friday

Mama needs her sugar. And also. She aint got no shame.

:)

I've never really thought about the fact that coffins fall apart. It's quite obvious. You know, it's bound to happen and it's not like I'm stupid or slow or anything for thinking otherwise.
That's just one thing I've never thought about.

Leopard and pearl

I've gotten bitten and smitten by the cool-outfit-bug lately. Or maybe it's just me loosing weight and feeling good enough about my body to start wearing clothes that look cool again. Funny how much bad self-image has to say about behavour and styling. 

So this was today's look.Shamelessly inspired by this young genious of a woman
http://phussy.bigcartel.com/

Have by the way also bought some ninetees pink heart-shaped sunglasses and can't wait for them to arrive in the mail (oh god I love you ebay!). Then you'll see me walking around with carrie-curls, coffee in one hand and a smoke (for the purpose of the look only. I am not a smoker, mom) in the other. Oh and big statement lips. OH and Vogue tucked in under one arm. And I am waving important with my smoke-hand. Because I'm important and fabulous. 

OH!

Loosing my job was the best thing that ever happened to me

It gave me the kick I needed to go do what I'm supposed to do.

Even

I've known this boy (or now more like starting to close in on being a man) for almost nine years now. We haven't spoken for years, but way back when, we were like... I don't know what we were like, but I used to tease him and he used to say I was stupid and every time I tried to give him a hug he ran for his life. So on saturday, when I dragged him with me to the studio, I was delighted to know that I was still as stupid and he still had to pull off the line "stop it, you are making me laugh".  Just as if that's not cool or whatever.

But he's a pretty cool fella. And I've been praising not only my talent in spotting good models, but also my talent in studio-skills - for the last four days. Yes, I do admit that I have more than five times daily shouted out praisings on my own awesomeness. Because this time, ladies and gentlemen... This time I really nailed the light-setting. I really, really nailed it! 

So thanks to Even for a gorgeous face and some funny moments, taking me back to taekwondoe-kicking time - and thanks to mum and dad for making such a prodigy as of what I am. Maybe I am overreacting just a tad here, but let's just roll with it people. Let's just roll with it...

-

ps this is by the way us "way back when". I am purposely keeping this picture small and unattainable so that you don't manage to see anymore of my foul look and attempt to hug this unwilling kid. It might seem wrong, but it wasn't cause he was super-cute and I know he secretly loved it. Deep down he did, I promise.

ps ps I am posting all of the pictures from the series on my other, more professional blog, called http://camillahayjenssen.blogspot.no/ . Go check it out!

Should I take a one-week-trip to London and not care about the money? Please say yes.

Sunday

Coffee, photoshop, Gorillaz and reading the local paper